Doctor Goscinski's Amazing Blog Suka!!!!!

That's right ladies and gentlemen, your Doctor's blog has grown too badass to be contained by the comments section any longer. It's spilled out to the main page. Holy shit. Actually Robort just left himself signed in on the computer at work. You'd think he would learn after last year when I posted as him coming out of the closet on STLbiking. The Ouachita Challenge is a race worthy of an honest to Energor blog post anyway, so here goes.

This year was my second go at this race. Last year the race itself was the longest MTB ride I had ever been on, I had no idea what I was getting into. This year I was much more prepared, knew what the climbs would be like, and knew what to expect from the giant cyclocross barrier known as Blowout Mtn (great for working on your mounts and dismounts). Our pre-ride the day before the race had me pretty excited to get started, the trail was super buff, and there was a fair amount of climbing before the single track to split the pack up a bit, which is great if you are on a single speed. After having a kick ass time camping with Team Trail Monster we packed up and made our way to the race. Starting time found Nico, Tropical Storm Ma(rio)son, and I at the back of the pack talking with some Cow-Town dudes. As soon as the roll out began we implemented our strategy of passing as many people as possible before entering the single track. I could see Nico just ahead of me spinning his nuts off and bobbing and weaving through the pack so I followed his lead. Going into the Womble I was in a good position, 3rd or 4th of the Single speeds, and I was feeling great. Then I got a rear flat. As I sat at the side of the trail fixing it I watched a good deal of the people I had pushed past on the initial climbs go past me, what a sinking feeling. I got it going as quick as I could and tried to make up some ground. It really makes a difference riding closer to the front of the pack, the faster dudes ride the technical stuff cleanly, and keep the pace consistent. Having to re-pass so many people can really slow you down.

After the 1st aid station I hit the highway by myself and started spinning, man was it windy. After what seemed like an eternity of highway and fire roads I was glad to see the single track again. The Ouachita Trail section of the race is absolutely brutal. While you are praying for single track on the fire roads leading up to it, you are praying for fire road again by the end of it. Steep, rocky, and relentless, but soooo much fun. The descents are as mind blowing as the rock gardens are ankle braking. On this section I finally started seeing people again, after being alone for miles. I was able to pick off several riders on the Blowout, and Big Brushy sections. I recognized a lot of the trail from the previous year so I knew when I was getting close to the end. The trail popped me out on the last fire road section and I hammered all the way back to the finish, dropping three more geared riders in the process. Nico greeted me at the finish line with pizza and a fresh PBR pint. I took 6th in single speed and 59th overall with a 6:30. This is the same amount of time it took me last year, but with the course being 10 miles longer this year with 1,000 more feet of climbing I was pretty pleased.

Things I learned this weekend:

1. It would take about 45 PBR pints to replace 9,000 calories.
2. TSM is a cuddler
3. Nico does have an odor very similar to rancid month old Sonic
4. Don't get flat tires
5. Having a sweet mullet makes you go faster

Monday found us rolling back to the STL in an extremely foul smelling Toyota, almost as sweet as my new whip, which can been seen in all it's glory on the Team Seagal page along with TSM and Nico's glorious race recaps. Until next time, don't be a dick. Oh, and check the Seagal page here: